Bright Side of the Road

Aug 16

Aug 16 The Apology

Erin Huttlinger

interpersonal

They feel guilty, and they offer themselves so sincerely, finding fault in their own level of friendship.

Jun 28

Jun 28 At the Bar

Erin Huttlinger

interpersonal, reflection

We’ll never know, but I can tell you now that, in our time together, we never ran out of things to talk about

May 31

May 31 Marigolds

Erin Huttlinger

reflection

The signs around the ICU were clear. “No plants or flowers allowed in Cardiac ICU.”

May 3

May 3 Different Directions

Erin Huttlinger

interpersonal, identity

Most of us have the luxury of enough emotional space to figure it out as we go.

Apr 11

Apr 11 The List

Erin Huttlinger

reflection

The only way his family saw him was if they bought tickets to a show. Such is the life of a working musician.

Mar 21

Mar 21 Collateral Damage

Erin Huttlinger

interpersonal

There’s always this kind of collateral damage–not the main hit, the center of the bullseye

Mar 7

Mar 7 Second Tier

Erin Huttlinger

interpersonal

I don’t want to call them angels because that’s a huge responsibility for them, but they are kind-hearted spirits who are mindful of their effect on me.

Feb 1

Feb 1 The Bathroom Blinds

Erin Huttlinger

reflection

It’s strange how certain things have burned into my memory like a bright light burns into your retina. The residual effect just lingers.

Jan 3

Jan 3 The Hug

Erin Huttlinger

interpersonal

I only had time to speak with them about five minutes each. I tried to ask them very specific questions about how they were coping

Nov 15

Nov 15 On The Other Foot

Erin Huttlinger

reflection, interpersonal

As needed–he was the patient, I was the caregiver. Then one day, everything reversed

Nov 2

Nov 2 When You Need It Most

Erin Huttlinger

interpersonal

It’s a tape loop in my mind that I can access anytime, and when I’m at my saddest it can even make me smile to myself.

Oct 19

Oct 19 Reflecting

Erin Huttlinger

reflection

Many people ask me if writing is cathartic. I’m still not clear on that, but I do know that the feedback that I have been given is hugely cathartic.

Oct 4

Oct 4 Compounding

Erin Huttlinger

reflection

I think to myself “Will this NEVER end?” Answer: “NO, get used to it.”

Sep 28

Sep 28 Working Backward

Erin Huttlinger

identity, reflection

I’m generally really good at working backwards, but now I’m at a loss.

Sep 13

Sep 13 The Long Drive

Erin Huttlinger

milestones

I’ve done all sorts of analysis. Time vs. Money. Cost A vs. Cost B. Likelihood of Death A vs. Likelihood of Death B.

May 18

May 18 Channeling Pete

Erin Huttlinger

identity

I step outside every morning, no matter the weather, and I say out loud, "What a beautiful day!" with a huge emphasis on beautiful.

May 4

May 4 I Miss Having Someone to Read

Erin Huttlinger

identity

I learned to look at their expressions and body language to determine when it was time for me to step in

Apr 27

Apr 27 Three Steps Back

Erin Huttlinger

reflection

I long for the downtime of the weekends, but I haven't been enjoying that space or quiet time

Apr 13

Apr 13 The Leap

Erin Huttlinger

interpersonal

Since Pete's passing, I've received numerous invitations to visit people. I just haven't been ready

Hi.

They feel guilty, and they offer themselves so sincerely, finding fault in their own level of friendship.

We’ll never know, but I can tell you now that, in our time together, we never ran out of things to talk about

The signs around the ICU were clear. “No plants or flowers allowed in Cardiac ICU.”

Most of us have the luxury of enough emotional space to figure it out as we go.

The only way his family saw him was if they bought tickets to a show. Such is the life of a working musician.

There’s always this kind of collateral damage–not the main hit, the center of the bullseye

I don’t want to call them angels because that’s a huge responsibility for them, but they are kind-hearted spirits who are mindful of their effect on me.

It’s strange how certain things have burned into my memory like a bright light burns into your retina. The residual effect just lingers.

I only had time to speak with them about five minutes each. I tried to ask them very specific questions about how they were coping

As needed–he was the patient, I was the caregiver. Then one day, everything reversed

It’s a tape loop in my mind that I can access anytime, and when I’m at my saddest it can even make me smile to myself.

Many people ask me if writing is cathartic. I’m still not clear on that, but I do know that the feedback that I have been given is hugely cathartic.

I think to myself “Will this NEVER end?” Answer: “NO, get used to it.”

I’m generally really good at working backwards, but now I’m at a loss.

I’ve done all sorts of analysis. Time vs. Money. Cost A vs. Cost B. Likelihood of Death A vs. Likelihood of Death B.